God has a sense of humor. When I wrote 5 Reasons Why Many Christian Girls Remain Single, I
never meant to follow it up with the same topic directed at men. But God had
other ideas! Two days ago, I decided not to listen to music as I normally do in
the morning but turned the radio on, hoping to hear a sermon. What I heard as I
scanned for the right channel was a reading from the expositor study bible from
Son life radio station here in Baton Rouge.
The couple
on the radio was reading from Genesis 24 – the story of how Eliezer (Abraham’s
servant) took a wife for Isaac. That particular morning, the story gripped me
in a way that I had hitherto experienced. I quickly jotted down what the
message spoke to me and headed out to work. Later that day, I read the story of
Eliezer again. This time, the reasons why many Christian men remain single
became unequivocally clear.
He is Not Listening to God’s direction
When Abraham spoke to Eliezer, he specifically directed him to
go back to his (Abraham’s) land and family to take a wife for Isaac. Without
godly direction, many men simply guess at where they should go to take a wife.
They travel here and there, chatting up wrong women after wrong women. By the
time they actually get to the place God wants them, the stories of their
travels have already reached the land. The women of the land are no longer
interested because they do not feel special…they feel like common currency
instead of a pearl of great prize. They think, I am one of many he could love,
not the one that he loves. Moreover, the man starts to look desperate to them
as they start to wonder why the other women did not pick the man up. Nothing
puts off a woman more than a desperate man.
But
guys who move with godly direction do not become unequally yoked with those
from strange lands. They do not have to chase after another man’s future
wife! Instead they set their course to the land of God and to the house
of God, which is now their house by birthright. Guys, that is the only place
where we find the sister that the Lord has planned for us.
He is Not Prepared to Meet His Mate
When Eliezer left, he left with all his master’s goods…which he
put on his camels. When we leave to find our beloved, we must not go
empty-handed but must leave with the goods of God. We must carry with us the
love of God and the gift of the Spirit of God. We
must be ready to be a blessing to her instead of going empty-handed, having to
ask for and live off some of her stuff. Men, it is extremely
difficult for a woman to respect a man who is not ready – who is not ready to
be leader, provider, spiritual leader, and godly man that he has been called to
become. When we go to find our wives, we must pack our bags of goodies and go.
If we have nothing to put in the goody bag, it is not quite our time…we still
have some work to do.
He Has Not Positioned Himself in the Right Spot
When
Eliezer got to his destination with his goods in hand, he positioned himself in
a spot by the well where he could see the women of the land. It is tragic to
think that many godly guys – who are following the will of God and have readied
themselves for marriage miss out because they do not purposefully hand around
godly women. They expect God to drop a wife on their lap without looking. I
wonder if Eliezer would have met Rebekah if he had not purposefully positioned
himself to be able to observe the women.
Just as Eliezer did, we have to position yourselves in the right
spot and then pray to God to show us which woman he desires for us.
Too many good men leave too many good women single because they simply will not
position themselves in the right spot. Then both the men and women say ‘there
is no good man or women around, they are all taken! No, they are not all
taken…they are simply in the wrong spot!
He Beats About the Bush
When Eliezer saw Rebekah, he did not hang around or beat about
the bush, but the bible tells us that he ran to her. Men, we cannot become shy
and coy when we see an all round desirable godly woman. She will not be at the
well forever! She has other things to do and a purpose to fulfill. If
you are Mr. Snail, then you may find that she is gone or disinterested by the
time you sum up the courage to go to her.
This reminds
me of the man who had been waiting to get into the pool of Bethesda for 38
years, who Jesus asked if he wanted to be made well. Instead of just saying
yes, the first words that came out of his mouth were excuses! He was going to
miss the opportunity to get well because he had pinned his hope on the waters!
Similarly,
you cannot pin your hopes on the lady you so desire noticing you per chance as
you beat about the bush. If you are going to pursue her, then pursue her!
He Never Made His Intentions Clearly Known
When Eliezer caught up to Rebekah and she had watered his
camels, he made it known to her the intention of his actions and his visit.
Alas, after positioning and pursuing, too many men miss out on destiny because
they end up in the friendship zone! After getting the woman’s initial
attention, they do not fess up to their hearts intentions out of fear of being
rejected. So they end u
Food for Thought: Instead of standing in hope, start walking in faith until you meet your destiny
Source: http://diaryofasuperchamp.wordpress.com
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